Guest Writer - Through thick and thin, good times and bad.

By Adry Awan

If my mental health journey has taught me anything, it is that one of the most valuable investments you can make in your life is time towards taking care of yourself. This is easier said than done of course; there were definitely times when in trying to manage my mental health, I neglected how I was feeling in fear of how I would be perceived or because I was ashamed at how I felt. There were times when my anxiety would make me agitated and angry quite easily and I was simply not enjoyable to be with. However, I am grateful that even in the most challenging of times, I had a strong support system whose love, compassion and care for me never wavered; a group of people who were committed to bringing out the best in me but most of all, being there for me through thick and thin, good times and bad.

For 10 years now, my support network has included my best friends - four guys who I first met in high school. Throughout our many years of friendship, these lads have never been shy to take action when they begin to notice mental ill-health significantly affecting my daily life, whether that be by expressing their concern through a phone call and text message, and encouraging me to talk about how I may be feeling, or taking me out to lunch or to play basketball as a way to clear my mind and mentally recharge. These lads have lifted me out of many bad days, even when mental ill-health would not allow me to be entirely receptive of their efforts.

I can remember being particularly reliant on the lads during my first semester at University. I was incredibly anxious at making the transition to University after having to postpone my start for one year in order to recover from radiotherapy treatment. At the time, the burden of being a cancer patient was still a large part of my identity, which made me heavily doubt my ability to manage an increased workload and make new friends while maintaining good physical and mental heath.

Thankfully, the lads made their presence felt and ensured that my start at University was as smooth as it could be. Given that several of them had started Uni one year before me and were well acclimatised to the demands of University life, they made sure to share insights and knowledge they had already gained, in order to help me make the best out of the new environment. These included tips like attending every lecture and tutorial and not leaving assignments to the last minute (which admittedly, I was not entirely good at doing a lot of the time). During major assessment periods, when I would experience bouts of anxiety more frequently, the lads would regularly check in on me to make sure that I was prioritising my mental health first and foremost. To help rebuild my self-confidence, they would remind me that I was not only more than just a cancer patient but I was also more than capable to achieve tremendous academic success at Uni.

And I was. I successfully completed my Bachelor’s Degree after three years at University, completing my studies on time.
 

Managing your mental health and wellbeing can be a difficult thing to do all on your own. What the lads have shown me through our continued friendship is how invaluable it is to surround yourself with people who remind you, through their actions and words, that there is no place they would rather be than right by your side through thick and thin, good times and bad.