Books about mental health

Books about mental health, especially those written by those with lived experience are a bit like a reassuring “Oh, thank goodness that I’m not the only one” moment for me every time I read them. I’ve read a fair few, but these are the ones that really resonated with me. Some of these are information based, others are more story based. These one’s centre around ocd and anxiety mostly.

I now want to read some books with autistic female characters. I don’t know what these are so if anyone has any good recommendations please let me know. I want more of that feeling of “it’s not just me” and “that makes sense now” and “I didn’t even realise I do that”.

I read all these quite a while ago now. I’ve gone through a stage of a few years where I just didn’t have the capacity to think that much and sit down like that. But after a suggestion from a lovely OT, I’ve given it a try and I can again. I was the sort of kid and teenager who just whizzed through lots of them & luckily for me it seems I’ve still got some of my speed!

First we make the beast beautiful.

By Sarah Wilson

First, We Make the Beast Beautiful reads like an anxious person’s mind which is oddly comforting as that’s what I'm like. It's not a preachy self-help book (thank goodness, I’m not a fan of those), but it does have some practical tips. It makes you go "Oh thank god, here is this super successful person who is just like me! Phew!" It is raw, honest and touching – I imagine a book like this would be personally taxing and revealing to write. It is perfect for anyone who is anxious or anyone who loves someone who is anxious. It will give you a good insight into the way their world works. 

I found this book to be brilliant. Sarah Wilson gives some great strategies, albeit some a little unusual as she tells the story of how her life has played out it felt like she was the same person as me - high achieving, determined, over worked, obsessive and anxious.  

She talks of how being anxious constantly is a lonely place to be, a feeling I know too well. "Anxiety is a very lonely condition; when you're anxious you've got to suffer alone. But we can all reach out and let each other know that we're not on our own, there's other people going through the same thing."

Because we are bad

By Lily Bailey

Lily Bailey’s book is about her experience with OCD. Many parts of the book sounded like they could have been my diary, the way she would analyse and go over every interaction and every little thing she had done wrong and what this meant about her character. How accidental glances at people meant that she was a pervert, that she had killed people with her brain and the compulsive praying sounded rather familiar.

"Ever since I can remember my brain has been flooded with weird and strange and uncomfortable thoughts, What if I kill someone with a thought? What if I think I want that person to die and then they do? What if my sister dies in her sleep? What if family leaves me in the night?"

Her book talks about how she would convince herself she was a pervert if she happened to look at someone's chest, a pedophile if she looked at a child, a murderer if she thought that someone had died. Then would come a huge list of every little thing she had said, done or thought wrong throughout the day.

"Until I was 16 nobody realised. Because I was so centred around not being perceived as bad, I hid it so people thought I was a a good student with nice friends and a happy life."

This seems to be something that is pretty common with people with this type of OCD, I know it was for me. That voice in my head would say I couldn't tell anyone about what I thought, that I was a monster and that I deserved to go to jail.

Like Lily, it took me a very long time to work out that I was in fact not a psychopath and believe that maybe this was just OCD - just not the type that is really spoken about. 

I would really recommend reading Lily's book to anyone who wants to understand what it is like inside the head of someone with OCD or if you struggle with it yourself. I will warn you that all this t a bit confronting too if it's like your experience, but it is reassuring to know that you aren't the only one and you really aren't all that bad.

The man who couldn’t stop

By David Adam

I found this book rather confronting, not because anything in it was new. Just because it was a) brutally honest, really exploring the darkest parts of our brains and places it was so similar to my own experiences – it felt odd seeing it written down on paper when I can’t say them aloud for fear of that making them true. He describes intrusive thoughts as a snowflake falling from the sky on a summer day. Something harmless which turns into a raging blizzard.

The highly sensitive person

By Elaine Aron

This was great at the time, helped me understand myself and matched up so well. I now know I’m autistic, and this is a term often used to describe people who are actually autistic but don’t know it.

Highly sensitive people tend to think and feel more deeply, they are more predisposed to anxiety and depression, they can be hypersensitive, struggle with decisions & working when others are watching, are usually conscientious & polite, are affected by other people’s emotions and can “make excellent leaders, friends and partners”. HSPs are sensitive souls and are often the most genuine, compassionate and honest people you'll come across.

Even without the autism diagnosis at the time, it was really helpful.

Turtles all the was down

By John Green

Turtles All the Way Down provides an authentic portrayal of living with OCD through its depiction of intrusive thoughts, anxiety, and compulsive behaviours. The novel can help readers with OCD feel understood and less isolated, while also increasing awareness and empathy among those who do not have the condition. Importantly, it conveys a hopeful message that OCD can be managed and does not define a person's identity or future.

John Green created turtles all the way down drawing from his lived experience of OCD - Green stated: "This is my first attempt to write directly about the kind of mental illness that has affected my life since childhood, so while the story is fictional, it is also quite personal."

This has been made in to quite another good film from one of John Green’s creations. I was scared to watch at first, I wasn’t in a place where I wanted to make my ocd worse (compulsive & avoiding I know)

The book was gifted to me a fair few years ago but due to all my ect, I didn't properly remember it but have re-read now I have my working memory back but like John Green's other books - I read it a few times so definitely a hit!